Career Crisis…or Just Motherhood?

Why so many millennial moms feel torn between ambition, identity, and the reality of raising tiny humans.

“Motherhood didn’t just change my schedule — it rearranged my entire sense of identity.”

Of all the things I expected to navigate as a mom—night feeds, diaper blowouts, Googling “is this normal?” at 3 a.m.—I did not anticipate having a full-blown identity crisis about my career. Truly, no one warned me about that part.

I was what the medical community so lovingly calls a “geriatric mother” (shoutout to whoever named that… hope you’re doing well). I had my first baby at 35, which meant I spent my entire twenties and most of my thirties doing whatever I wanted. I had freedom, brunch energy, and a genuine sense of career fulfillment.

When I met my husband, I felt totally ready for the “next chapter.” Stable career? Check. Emotional maturity? Check. Cute diaper bag Pinterest board? Check.

But here’s where millennial moms sit in a very weird spot historically. We were raised watching our boomer moms fight for the right to work and raise kids. So we grew up believing:

“Of course I can work full-time, chase promotions, maintain self-care, and raise emotionally secure tiny humans.”

Then I became a mom… and everything flipped.

Suddenly, the idea of returning to work wasn’t “challenging” — it was repulsive. It took an entire year just to feel human again.

When I finally did return, I capped myself at 12 hours a week. Even if it meant cutting back on everything. Groceries, date nights, luxuries — all gone. And yet, I wanted nothing more than to be home soaking up my baby’s tiny face.

Wanting to stay home doesn’t make you lazy. Wanting to work doesn’t make you selfish. Motherhood is not a binary.

And still… I felt conflicted.
The guilt. The pressure. The “am I doing this right?” spiral.

I wanted to be home — but felt “less than” for struggling financially.
I wanted career fulfillment — but felt heartbroken being away from my baby.
I wanted ambition — but also softness, slowness, connection.

Is this a career crisis?
Or is it a predictable outcome of motherhood under capitalism?

“If childcare were affordable and maternity leave humane, half of us wouldn’t be questioning our entire careers.”

Because let’s be real:

Would any of us feel this conflicted if we had…
✔️ Paid maternity leave for a year
✔️ Safe, loving, affordable childcare
✔️ A culture that didn’t expect women to work like they don’t have kids and mother like they don’t have jobs

Probably not.

This conflict isn’t a personal flaw.
It’s a systemic failure wrapped in a pink “girl power!” bow.

What This Really Is

Not a career crisis.
A cultural crisis.

You are not broken.
You’re navigating an impossible equation with love, grit, and almost no sleep.

And that deserves compassion — not shame.

If this hits home… you’re not alone.

At Women in Bloom Wellness, I support women navigating the emotional weight of motherhood: postpartum shifts, identity transitions, nervous system overload, and the invisible mental load that no one else sees.

Here’s how you can get support:
✨ Join the Women in Bloom App Waitlist — daily emotional tools, mom-friendly journaling, and nervous system support are coming soon
✨ Download a guided journal to help you reconnect with yourself
✨ Follow on Instagram @WomenInBloomWellness for daily validation & emotional support
✨ Join the newsletter for weekly grounding practices & gentle education

You don’t have to figure this out alone.
You deserve support that meets you where you are.